The Medway Discussion Group met to discuss which of our ancestors we would like to meet and what we would like to ask them.
One member would like to meet her great grandmother Matilda, who was of Bavarian descent. She married well but liked a drink and betting on the horses. Finally, her husband had her committed to Barming where she twice tried to commit suicide and never forgave him for sending her. She was eventually released but parted from her husband and moved to live in Rochester, was taken ill with gangrene and died in All Saints Poor House. Her family member wanted to ask her why she drank and gambled when she had such a seemingly good life. Would she have been diagnosed with a mental health illness in more modern times and received the treatment she needed?
Another group member wanted to meet their paternal great grandmother, Rosetta. She and her husband had five children, but the only daughter died young. Rosetta died during WW2 and when her home was entered, it was full of tins of food. Rosetta had been hoarding for years, which was completely against the laws in force at the time. There were many other family members also called Rosetta, and our group member wanted to ask if Rosetta kept in touch with any of them.
The next group member wanted to meet their 2x great grandfather William, born in 1789. A book binder by trade, he had two children by his first wife followed by six by his second wife. Our member wanted to ask how he coped with all of them. Then there was great grandmother Eliza who had two illegitimate children before marrying and having more. During record searches, her surname inexplicably changed. Our member wanted to ask why… did she make the name up?
We next heard about a paternal grandfather… the grandparent that our group member never knew. He had been a blacksmith by trade, and married in 1929, with a child born nine months later. The grandfather liked a drink and a bet on the horses and the marriage was soon on the rocks. It seems that finally leaving the family home broke him, he became a tramp and died in 1957. His son, our group member’s father, attended his funeral but within the family, little was spoken about him. Rather than ask him a question, our group member wanted to be able to tell her grandfather about his descendants.
A group member wanted to meet her great grandmother Celia to ask if she knew who her real parents were. There were different names listed on her birth and baptismal records with the possibility that her mother’s sister was the birth mother. The group member wanted to know whether the man who brought Celia up was the villain or hero in this story.
Yet another group member wanted to meet Bartholomew, an ancestor from fifteen generations back. Our group member wanted to ask where Bartholomew came from and how he acquired his property, which was passed down many generations.
One group member had a music hall actor as her great grandfather who had a double act with a Miss King. He was 34 years older than his wife, with whom he had seven children. Our group member had questions for him about whether Miss King was her great grandmother, why he changed his name and whether the rumours were correct that he knew Charles Dickens.
The next member wanted to speak to her grandfather William who came from Kent, moved to Woolwich and married a young widow. Questions included how they met and whether it was a culture shock moving from east Kent to London. The couple moved back to the Kent coast, bought a plot of land and built a house. They then moved away again in 1939 with the possibility of invasion. Our member wondered how they made that decision to leave.
The final group member wanted to meet her 7x great grandfather Ralph from Cheshire, who died in 1729. Amongst his children, he had two sons, the elder of which studied divinity at Brasenose. Our group member wanted to ask Ralph how he could afford to send his son to an Oxford college, especially as the family seemed to be weavers down the generations.
Many questions were asked and a few suggestions made as to possible answers and avenues to follow. It’s always interesting to share our research and make use of the knowledge of other group members. It was also lovely to see people responding to this session’s question on KFHS social media.
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Report by Helen Stenhouse